EXISTENTIALISM

Broken Bells- They say it best.

Image from http://weheartit.com

Vaporize lyrics by Broken Bells
What amounts to a dream anymore?
A crude device; A veil on our eyes
A simple plan we'd be different from the rest
And never resign to a typical life

Common fears start to multiply
We realize we're paralyzed
Where'd it go, All that precious time?
Did we even try to stem the tide?

Why should we waste it on
Buying into the same old lies?
The longer we wait around
The faster the years go by

It's not too late
To feel a little more alive
Make an escape
Before we start to vaporize

Doubtless, we've been through this
So if you want to follow me you should know
I was lost then and I am lost now
And I doubt I'll ever know which way to go.

I look at some adults basking in plain-ness and lame-ness and they immediately become a subject of ridicule to me. It's not in my capacity to comprehend such resignation to such a typical life. Marriage at 23, 2 children that are well educated and well dressed, church on a Sunday, behind a desk on Monday, the only excitement being Easter or Christmas or far away dream-like life of a friend they wish they could be. Broken Bells 'vaporize' lyrics wrap my thoughts up perfectly. I speak to some adults who say things like: "I wish I could play an instrument." or, "Throughout my life I wished I could open my own tea shop and serve croissants to newspaper reading people, but I never did."- seriously people? Are you really being so thick? HELLO, it's most definitely is not too late!

But you see, this is the part where I become disillusioned. Life works in peculiar ways that aren't in our favour. It's mightily unfortunate and I wish it wasn't so, but reality has the reputation of knocking people of their pedestals where their heads are so passionately wrapped in a cloudy haze. It's all a challenge you see, a ginormous boulder you just have to persevere in climbing over. And you can do it! I know I can. You just shouldn't give in so easily, you shouldn't allow yourself to be hypnotized by routine. If you find yourself 'vaporizing', make an escape. Don't let the years go by, use your precious time, all of it and use it wisely.

I often ask myself the question "if I had to die now, would I be satisfied with the way my life has turned out?" and the answer is often no. I've spent my life waiting. Waiting for my life to begin. And that's all wrong, that's where old tempus doth fugit and before you know it you're stuck, and it becomes too easy to just procrastinate rather than do something about the bleakness. So I've made a promise to myself- never to allow the time to beat me. I'm stronger and wiser, I, just like any other human, have the ability to capture my dream. It may not be as glamorous as it is up in that mind tank of mine but I sure can try my best. And that's all that matters, trying. So like me, fellow citizen, go forth, enter into the life you want. Don't make excuses, don't allow common fears to multiply.

If ever I feel uncomfortable or unsure about doing something, I question my demotivation. Do I not want to do something out of fear? Is it FEAR that is holding me back? If so, I do it. I get out of my comfort zone regardless. It's like I fear fear. But that is better than letting fear hold you back. Rather fear fear than succumb to fear.

DO IT! GO FORTH! STEP OUT IN NEW CLOTHES. CHANGE IS PROGRESS. ALLOW IT.